Thursday, July 30, 2009

The Coolest Thing Ever!

Cool...way cool...the coolest thing I have ever made! AND it's a great homeschool science project - even cooler!

3/4 cups warm water
1 cup Elmers glue
food colour of choice
2 tsp. borax (cleaning product)
1/2 cup warm water

In first bowl, mix top three ingredients. In a second bowl, mix last two ingredients
Make sure both bowls are well mixed.
Pour bowl one into bowl two.
No need to stir, just reach in a pull out the glob of flubber.
The consistency improves by 'kneading' the glob for a few minutes.
Lasts way longer than playdough...and, if I didn't mention it yet - it's way cooler!

For more great show and tell stuff, go over and visit Mary's place.

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Zippy Corn Chowder

I've been working out a new menu plan for this coming and have decided to make a 'soup day' once per week. This is the newest soup recipe that has been appreciated by my clan. I hope you enjoy it! Don't's not that spicy with the cream base.

1 medium onion, chopped
1 medium green pepper, chopped
2 tbsp. margarine
1 can chicken broth
2 large potatoes, cubed
1 jalapeno pepper, chopped
2 tsp. dijon mustard
1 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. paprika
1/4 - 1/2 tsp. crushed red pepper flakes
3 cups corn
4 green onions, chopped
3 cups milk, divided
1/4 cup flour
- saute onion and green pepper in margarine until tender
- add broth and potatoes; bring to boil and then simmer until potatoes tender
- add jalapeno, mustard, salt, paprika and pepper flakes; blend well
- add corn, green onions, and 2 1/2 cups milk
- make a roux with remaining milk and flour and add to soup; bring to boil and stir while cooking until thickened and bubbly

Monday, July 27, 2009

The Perfect Marriage

Recently, I have enjoyed reading some posts about building up our marriages. Of course, from a wife's perspective it is mostly about how to build up our husbands. These types of conversations have occurred among ladies' groups many times, both face-to-face and online. Without fail, at least one woman will claim martyrdom in her marriage. She will claim that she works hard at her marriage and prays unceasingly for her husband, but that God is not listening to her prayers; that nothing she has ever done has affected a long-lasting positive change in her lazy, unloving or real jerk of a husband. She will then claim that most wives don't understand her situation because they must be married to men who hold up their end of the biblical marriage.

What a load of manure!

(Now God has been showing me to hold my sarcasm and derogatory tones to myself, but this is one area that really tests my resolve to use 'soft answers'. Today as I write, some of my disdain for these 'martyrs' may leak out - for that, I apologize)

Most of the time I just stare blankly at these women while they attempt to convince me that God's plan is not working in their marriage. Generally they end up telling me (and other wives) that we likely can't understand their situation because of our perfect marriages.

Could someone please hand me a shovel, it's time to remove a few layers of crap and share some truth.

There was nothing perfect about my husband and I when we married - there's nothing perfect now. There have been countless times when one or both of us has openly refused to yield to God's plan for our marriage and we have paid the price for it with hurt feelings and lost time as "heirs together in the grace of life". Since this is my blog, I'll share an example of when my husband was being a complete jerk - I'll share a jerk story about me some other time ;o)
This occasion occurred when I was thoroughly examining my role as a wife. The Lord was showing me that my attempts to persuade or manipulate changes in my husband were futile - that only He could change him, if it were His will. We had been through a particularly nasty set of arguments over several weeks, so I put my hands up and said, "OK, God. I'll give him over to you and concentrate on how I should be acting."

And, I did. And it got worse - or at least, it felt like it was worse because I had to bite my tongue each time I believed my husband was baiting me or insulting me. Looking back, of course, I know Satan was giving me every opportunity to ignore God's advice - he never wants God's people to succeed and grow!

One particularly bad day I came home from work (still working full time) and my husband had been home with Duck all day. The house was a royal mess. I had had a long day at work. Not exactly a situation that made me want to love and honour my husband! But I determined to follow my deal with God. I smiled and made supper. Helped Duck to bed. Headed for the kitchen to clean. My husband headed to the couch and TV. Grrrr!

THEN, as I was elbow deep in the second load of dishes, my husband wanders into the kitchen, pours himself a pop and on the way out of the room tosses this comment over his shoulder.
"Dog needs water."

There are only a few time in my life where I have been angry enough to do physical damage. This was one.

I held onto the sink so hard my knuckles were white. God, Himself must have been holding my feet, because my husband is still alive today. Through gritted teeth (not exactly a submissive spirit) I prayed. For both of us. And God was gracious to give me peace about the situation. Again, I determined to work on my role as wife and leave my husband to God. I finished the kitchen and joined him to watch the news.

The little battles within myself continued but I did see glimpses of change in my marriage. Any positive events were held in my heart like gold! These golden moments were a treasure but they left me unconvinced that there was real change happening in my husband. Pessimism is a terrible waste of energy!

On a sunny Sunday we returned home from church and my husband was in foul mood. He changed his clothes and announced that he was taking the dog for a walk. Apparently there were spiritual battles happening in his mind because he unceremoniously stated, "I'm not going back to church tonight" and walked out the door.

"Why isn't daddy going to church, mommy?"
"I don't know, babe."
"Is daddy mad?"
"I don't know, sweetie. Let him talk to God for awhile." That was what I told myself, too. Again.

Duck was napping when my husband returned. He had taken the dog to walk at the river park across the road. The park area is on the other side of the river and there are boat locks that provide a walkway over the water. When no boats are travelling through, the walkway splits in two to let the boats through (kind of like french doors). He had been gone a long time, but even if I looked over, I wouldn't expect to see him on the other side.

He came home with a testimony of how God had been working on his life and heart.

I was all ears!

He admitted he had been acting selfishly and had, at times, been deliberately antagonizing. He confessed of his refusal to except responsibilities as leader in the family and co-participant in our marriage. Basically, his testimony was how he had been living with an its-all-about-me attitude and God had been making a change in that.

You see, he was telling this testimony as he was dripping wet.

He had left the house clouded in selfishness and bitterness. So much self involved he didn't look to see if the walkway of the locks was closed. While walking across the first half of the walkway, he was calling for the dog, who had run down the riverbank. The dog turned to follow. My husband turned just in time to see his next step into mid-air. There was no stopping.


Coming up for air, he looked up to the walkway to see our dog looking down and smiling at him. He says he knew it was God telling him to snap out of it - that it wasn't all-about-him.

That, ladies, is better than any resolution or approach any wife could manage. That, my friends, built my faith that God listens and participates in our lives.

I gave thanks that day (and repeatedly since) that, not only did God hear my prayers, but He was gracious to show me that He had heard me! I gave thanks that He cares for me in my role as a wife, as well as His daughter. I gave thanks that His plan for marriage is the best and only way to strive for perfection.

There have been times since then that I have tried to 'fix' my husband and each time God reminds me that that is His job. And, I give thanks again. Because nothing I could ever do would ever be as effective (and satisfying) as throwing my husband in a river!

What's the point of this story?

Father, teach me to be the woman You would have me to be regardless of the situations that may surround me. Open my eyes to be the wife my husband needs and remind me often that You will provide the husband I need. Amen
But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughter ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers by not hindered.
Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous:
Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
1Peter :4-9 (emphasis mine)

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Girls' Trip!

We made it through our annual girls' trip and returned home on Saturday afternoon. We could have made it home earlier, but there were so many yard sales along the route home!

As I mentioned before we left, this was the first year that HH's little sister was BIG enough to come along - she's three. The best part for her was a fact that she kept repeating - "no boys allowed!" Remember, these are the only two girls out of 6 kids.

Here is little sister helping her mom relax at the beach:All the girls spent two full days at the campground's beach. Duck and HH were very good at including little sister in their play, but they loved being off on their own, too. Diving into the waves was longest lasting game:We were at Sand Banks Provincial Park, near Kingston, Ontario. It never fails to have good waves for swimming, but the water is actually quite shallow because of the 'sand banks' that go so far out from shore. The sun was out, but the wind was chilly and the water was like ice - for anyone over the age of 10, that is! The three girls didn't stop playing until they hit their tents and bed rolls. Of course, bedtime only happened after the s'mores had been made over the fire! Another great trip.

For more Show and Tell, go to Mary's place.

Wednesday, July 22, 2009


Let's see...back from camping Saturday afternoon. It is now Wednesday night - almost midnight. I am just finished laundry, packing gear away, planning grocery list (shopping to be done tomorrow), got the garden cleaned up and school back on track.
Four days vacation, followed by four days of catch up. Sounds about right.
Right now, with Duck in bed and my husband gone to work, I plan on spending time catching up on reading my favourite blogs. A normal day waits for me tomorrow.
Pictures and more posts coming soon!

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Family Adventure Day!

Yesterday was beautiful weather and we spent several hours on the water in a canoe. We have friends who work for the Ministry of Natural Resources in Algonquin Provincial Park. The use of the canoe comes with the cabin where they are staying - lucky for us to know them! Since we sold our kayaks a year and half ago, because Duck was too big to fit in with us (darn those long legs!) we have really missed this part of the outdoors.
Duck is still learning how to paddle, so she sat in the middle while my husband and I toured across a large lake:
We stopped at a landing several kilometres away and gave Duck some time in the front of the canoe trying out her skills. Homeschooling is everywhere and dad is a great teacher!: This final shot is a group of loons that were playing in the middle of lake. Look closely, the third one has his head under water. They are one of my favourite birds because of their beauty and their playfulness:
Now I leave you for the week. The Duck and I are off for our annual girls' trip with our friends, Ducks friend HH and her mom. The special part of this year's trip is that HH's little sister is coming with us for the first time - she's three y.o. We told her last week that she could join us this year and it has been the longest week of her life waiting to go!
I'm sure I'll bring back some great pictures! Have a great week.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Reality At The Beach

Duck and I spent the afternoon today at the beach. There are two notable things about my Duck; one, she's friendly and social; two, as an only child she enjoys meeting new kids.

When we got to the beach it was full of kids of all ages. Duck waded into the water and surveyed the surroundings. She played and swam by herself for awhile and eventually wandered over to a gaggle of girls. I watched from the sidelines from behind my sunglasses.

She talked with the girls for several minutes and then turned and walked away, then spent several minutes digging in the sand by herself. When she returned up to my perch, we talked about several things and then I asked what the conversation with the girls had been about.

"Oh, I heard them planning on playing dolphins and I asked if I could play with them. Most of the girls said 'okay', but one said 'no'. So I walked away."

What's a mother to say? Duck didn't seem terribly upset by the event, but it must have felt awkward to be pushed away like that. So I just told her the truth.

"Well, my Duck. Sometimes public school kids aren't socialized very well."

She already knew that was true anyway. ;o)

How Does My Garden Grow?

Today I am showing and telling about this year's garden. I love my garden, even with all the 'tragedies' that must be endured. This is the best, full shot I could get of it. We have green beans, peas, tomatoes, watermelon, eggplant, squash, cucumbers and corn planted this year:The corn is always a struggle in our cold climate. So when we see the fruit coming out it is a fantastic event! Even if we only get 1/2 dozen cobs, that meal is worth it!This next section shows the wild vegetation that we enjoy. This is one of the potato plants that have grown spontaneously in our garden every year. We don't plant them, they just grow. Each year I think I have pulled all the new potatoes out, each new year another plant(s) appears:These aren't really wild, but they were present on the property when we got here. There are several 'bushes' of these perennials just starting to blossom - if anyone knows the name, I'd love to hear it:I saw these in a gardening book just this past winter - they grow in the brush by my garage. Apparently they are garlic? The spear-like flowers are supposedly edible, but in the fall I will be pulling them up to see if there really is a garlic bulb in there:Finally, this is the plant that grows at my entrance. The container is an old, rusty milk can salvaged from a barn. The plant? I have no idea - pretty much just a weed that grew out of the soil I filled the container with. The original plan was to plant flowers, but this vine is quite nice...for a weed! There you have it. Proof that I don't kill every green thing that comes to my care. Hopefully in the fall I will be able to show and tell some of the produce we expect to enjoy. IF I can keep the critters at bay!

For more show and tell, go see Mary's place!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

School's Out?

Not at my house! One thing I love about homeschooling is that we can make our school work fit around my husband's work schedule. If daddy is home for the day, we generally leave the books on the shelf and find fun things to do. Most of our school year is set up for four days in a week - Tuesday to Friday. Occasionally I throw a Saturday in the mix for catch up.

With a flexible schedule, we have been able to take vacations during the 'normal' school year that ensures we get good prices on hotels and tour group events. It also means that we don't have to fight the crowds when we do travel. In fact, usually when we're travelling in one direction at the beginning of the week, all the other cars are headed the opposite direction.

However, it does mean that even in the beginning of July we still have some lessons to finish. Math, english, science and social studies are still hanging on. We should be done within the next two weeks - which is good because we want to go camping and leave the books behind!

All-in-all, I will take a flexible schedule, a four day school week and a shorter summer break over the rigidity of the public school system any day! And Duck agrees, except that she would choose to just ignore the rest of math ;o)

Monday, July 6, 2009

Was It a Loss?

In my post about my dad, I made a quick comment about how my mother and the majority of the extended family want nothing to do with me and my immediate family. It is a disconnection that resulted from our decision to live for Christ in an open way - which, in turn, offended the very non-christian, feminist values of my mother. Mrs. Parunak commented on that post that this must have been a high price for our faith. That got me thinking about where we were before with the extended family and where we are now.

For several years after my husband and I started attending church regularly, my extended family and I tolerated each others differing opinions. However, as I mentioned in the original post having a different opinion from the matriarchal authorities of my extended family is not something that happens. Ever. So maintaining the relationship for those years was a great strain on my marriage - because, of course, it was all my husband's fault. Or so the line goes from the matriarchs.

Each visit 'down home' never failed to present snide remarks about our growing beliefs/convictions. This made for tiring vacations and some quarreling between my husband and I. But we continued the relationships under the guise of 'these people are family'. This was all before my daughter was born. Once a grandchild was added to the mix, the pressure to conform to the wishes of the grandparents became even stronger (I exclude my father from the pressure factor as he always was and continues to be very supportive in our parental rights).

As the pressure grew, so did the quarrelling within my marriage. We both felt the sense of 'duty' to our extended families - looking back we can see it was more a sense of guilt if we did not measure up to expectations.

As I said, once my daughter arrived the matriarchs wanted to be directly involved in how she was raised. Obviously their feminist views did not mix well with our biblical view and their comments and criticisms became more and more overt. Again, it must be my husband's fault; or maybe it was the church's fault. I must be under the influence of some strong brainwashing to veer away from the liberal, feminist facts-of-life!

If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you.
If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you. John 15: 18 & 19

When it all came to a head one day in my home that was the storyline the matriarchs were selling - I was involved in a cult and being brainwashed into subjugating myself and my daughter. Let me assure you, once I was labelled with that doozy of a label nothing I said mattered. As far as they were concerned, I was no longer thinking or speaking for myself. Ironically, this was the first time in my life that I really was thinking and speaking for myself. I had been released from the indoctrination of liberalism and feminism and was finally looking at life through clear eyes.

However, no amount of conversation could dissuade my mother from trying to 'save' me and my daughter from the cult and from my husband. On the day of my daughter's third birthday, children's services showed up at the door. We had been accused of being emotionally and physically abusive to Duck. Emotionally abusive because we were teaching from a biblical standpoint and therefore subjugating her. The physical abuse accusation was based on spanking - a discipline that was used by both sets of grandparents in their parental years.

The idea that she was trying to save me was the story for the rest of the family and for the social worker. This ploy was nothing more than a strong-arm attempt to control my family. It failed miserably for her.

The long and drawn out investigation included dozens of people supporting us - doctors, policemen and even a paramedic who knew us wrote complimentary letters about the care my daughter received from us. Neighbours and church members came forward and clearly denied the accusations. However, when it comes to children's services you are guilty until proven innocent and the next several weeks were terrible with the knowledge that in this country that is drowning in socialism, the government agency could take our daughter anytime they wanted without ever giving a explanation.

The failure for my mother came at the end of the investigation when we received a letter stating clearly that there had been no evidence of abuse to continue the case. With that nonsense behind us, we were convinced that it was best not to include the offending parties in the life of our daughter again. We did so based on practical bible study, particularly these sections:

Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousnous with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lrod, and touch not the unclean thing, and I will receive you,
and will be a Father unto you and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty. 2 Corinthians 6:14 - 18

And have no fellowhsip with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather reprove them. Ephesians 5:11

There was no way to ignore the unfruitful works of darkness in the heavy hand of the matriarchs. In the end, we could not justify a relationship that could endanger our marriage, our daughter and even our faith. Can we call this a loss? No.

Since the extended family has been removed from our path, we have grown spiritually and our marriage has been relieved of the quarrelling that once came with travelling home. My father and his wife continue to support us even if they don't hold to our convictions or faith. But our eyes are wide open now to the dangers of a relationship with non-believers. We are more careful to 'lead a quiet and peaceable life' (1 Timothy 2:2) while still following our convictions.

Do we expect that we will never be persecuted again? Well, I have to say that is my prayer, as selfish as it may be - but in the end, we hope our situation is one that glorifies God. Maybe one day, another christian will be placed in this same situation and we will be there to share our story and support.
Yea, doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ, Phillipians 3:8

Friday, July 3, 2009

Laughter Relieves Stress

This is for Kelly and her husband who had a very negative interaction with Canadians recently. Happy July 4th! (be careful, Kelly, uncontrolled laughter could induce labour!)

Imagine you're walking down a deserted street with your wife and small children.

Suddenly, an Islamic terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities , praises Allah, raises the knife and charges at you. You are carrying a legal, registered Kimber 1911 cal. 45 ACP, and you are an expert shot.

With mere seconds before he reaches you and your family, what would you do?


Well, that's not enough information to make a decision.
Does the man look poor or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think?
Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does the pistol have appropriate safety built into it?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my children? Why do I have so many children?
Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me while my family gets away?
Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise the taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behaviour!
This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a concensus.




Click...(sounds of reloading)
Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"
Son: "Can I shoot the next one, Dad?"
Wife: "You're not planning on hanging that on the wall, are ya'?"
Okay, what category do you fit into?!

Sunday School Summer Picnic

Every summer we plan a picnic at our church. We always say it's for the kids, but the adults enjoy it just as much! Here is the pastor giving the kids some instructions for games. Take a look at the difference in facial expressions in the kids. The older ones have heard it all before, but look at the little blonde in front of the pastor: Here is a closer shot of her expression. Such attention! Actually, knowing this little thing like I do (I'm Auntie Kim) I know what she's thinking. "Alright Pastor, whatever you say...just get on with the prizes!Most of the races are set up for all age groups, including the adults. However, the running races are just for the kids - after about 18yo, nobody wants to run anymore ;o) The shoe kick competition has become more popular since we added a target! That's my hubby standing in the field as all the teenage ladies try to hit him with a shoe. If you can hit him, you get that bag of smarties in his hand: I'm trying so hard to hit my husband, I have to stick my tongue out! Serious competition for smarties!
Here a couple of action shots of the egg toss. That's me in the blue shirt and white shorts. I have looked closely, but I can't see the egg that I'm catching: This shot shows the moment the egg broke in my hand. So gross! But we did take third place. The kids are great to watch at the egg toss, especially when it does break on them! That's Duck just missing the egg - but it didn't break that time: And, what's a picnic without several long tables lined with food? We'll never starve at our church! And once the games and food are done, the prizes come out. Our pastor knows how to pick good prizes. Junk food for anyone over 18yo and toys for the kids. Look at this mischievious fellow about to shoot his new nerf gun at the unsuspecting crowd below him:
And a wonderful time was had by all! We'll do it all again next year!
For more great show and tell stories, go see Mary!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Life As a Vapour

Just the other day we learned of the death of a pastor. He was only 50 years old; he pastored a very large church with a Christian school as part of the ministry; he authored many books; he was well-known among his doctrinal circle; he actively preached against the doctrine of which I believe. He leaves behind this large ministry, a wife as young as he was and several grown children. His death was a surprise to all who know him or have heard of him and, as he was a stong leader, this will be a great blow to his ministry.

It will also be a greatly negative witness to all the non-christians who were watching. You see, he committed suicide.

How does a man such as this come to a point of such despair that he takes his own life? In his vast ministry was there no one who he could turn to with his problems? When he preached about the Lord this past Sunday, could he find no solace in his salvation message? Did he not have a relationship with the Comforter? How does his congregation respond to the thought that their seemingly righteous leader could find no other means to resolve pain and sorrow?

So many questions, but I am left with very simple answers. This man was lost in his sin. Sin so greivous that he believed there could be no forgiveness. Even pastors can be lost.

The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly. John 10:10 (emphasis mine)
It isn't appropriate to make assumptions about the specific 'why' the man could no longer live with himself. However, it is important to cry out to those who would feel as though they have been left floundering for understanding. The size of a ministry does not proclaim the level of righteousness of it's leaders. Christ's own ministry on earth came down to just 11 men.
For Christians everywhere, we need to remember a simple adage that (oddly) comes from a character in the original movie, 'Anne of Green Gables':
"To despair is to give up on God", Marilla Cuthbert
For biblical comfort, we need to turn to David's Psalm 27:
The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? the Lord is the strength of my life; of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell. Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident. One thing have I desired of the Lord, that will I seek after; that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to behold the beauty of the Lord, and to enquire in his temple. For in the time of trouble he shall hide me in his pavilion: in the secret of his tabernacle shall he hide me; he shall set me up upon a rock. And now shall mine head be lifted up above mine enemies round about me: therefore will I offer in his tabernacle sacrifices of joy; I will sing, yea, I will sing praises unto the Lord. Hear, O Lord, when I cry with my voice: have mercy also upon me, and answer me. When thou saidst, Seek ye my face; my heart said unto thee, Thy face, Lord, will I seek. Hide not they face far from me; put not thy servant away in anger: thou hast been my help; leave me not, neither forsake me, O God of my salvation. When my father and my mother forsake me, then the Lord will take me up. Teach me thy way, O Lord, and lead me in the plain path, because of mine enemies. Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty. I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord. (emphasis mine)
We need to pray for those who are struggling, who looked to this pastor for leadership and strength, and pray that they do not follow his example but look to the Lord for true leadership and strength. That is the only place for a christian to find solace.