A Book Review 4

'Daddy Dates' is a book written by Greg Wright where he is talking about the revelation he had regarding his responsibilities in raising his four daughters. The idea of a father being involved in the lives of his children, girls or boys, isn't really a new idea - God planned it long, long ago. However, with so many men ignoring this responsibility, it was a pleasure to see that this book existed!

Mr. Wright's easy reading and humourous approach to describe his journey has little to do with scripture. His heart is obviously in the right place and he takes his responsibility of loving his daughters very seriously. His tag line for the whole issue is 'Don't screw up!'.

I can appreciate the work that he put into the relationship that he is building with each of his children. He is honest and he shows how the work has paid off for him with each of his girls. Mr. Wright does not talk over anyone's head and is open to admitting where he made mistakes, as well - which is something that always helps others trying the same thing.

I can recommend the book, but my enthusiasm is limited. Christian men who are sitting on the fence about being godly fathers may have seen a stronger case for 'daddy dates' with the appropriate scripture attached. My husband perused the book and found it was a little too light on a topic that needs to be taking seriously.

However, it is positive to have the topic out there and available in a format to introduce to men who are just stepping into the realm of fatherhood.

Disclaimer: I receive books from Thomas Nelson Publishers (Booksneeze) free of charge in exchange for my unbiased opinion of them. I am not threatened or rewarded in any way in efforts to encourage me to provide a positive review. All opinions are mine.

Norwalking on the Wild Side

Gingerale - check

Good supply of TP - check

Jello - check

Individual buckets to carry around - check

Can you guess what we have been doing in our house for the last week and a half? That's right...the norwalk virus hit like a tornado two Saturday's ago. I remember the moment clearly. Duck looked up at me, with a slight green tinge to her face, and said, "I don't feel very well". Within three minutes the first bucket had been used.

Now Duck had the worst of it. Her vomiting was out of control and we had to take a trip to the hospital for some help to stop it - at least for awhile. They gave her a magic pill that cleared up the nausea for over 4 hours! The next day she was still quite sick and living on the gingerale and jello diet. You see, norwalk may start off with coming 'up', then it moves 'down'. By Monday she was back to a normal colour. Then her little brother followed in her footsteps.

Ever try to explain to a nine month old that throwing up is okay? Hoss was a real trooper, though. His up-chucking stage only lasted part of one day and then we went through a tonne of diapers! The worst part with a little one is how much weight is lost in such a short time. Although the virus passes through quickly, it takes several days to re-train the tummy to eat normally. Almost one full week to get the little guy back to normal portions of formula and food. Plus the long lasting effect would be his new addiction to jello.

Now,infection control is still possible with an 11yo who can use a bucket and wash her hands - it is a different story when a baby is just using me to catch his emesis. So, then it was my turn. There is a question if it was just a coincidence that I spent a day with the bucket as my best friend, though. The night prior, my husband took me out for a nice dinner at a restaurant and I devoured a rack of honey garlic ribs. The garlic was excessive! So there is a question if that was what had me heaving - because that was the only symptom that I suffered. Not that made any difference during the time.

So...the question rises. How do we find something to be thankful about in all of this?

Actually, it wasn't too difficult to answer. You see, the three days prior to Duck becoming ill she spent on vacation with our friends at Niagara Falls Great Wolf Lodge Resort. It is a huge water park resort where they had an incredibly good time. Saturday morning, again before any ugly symptoms arose, she spent the time with her dad at the shooting range. So, we look at the fact that her vacation and daddy date were not hindered by the virus - a blessing to be thankful for indeed.

As for me, this past Saturday was a homeschool conference that I always enjoy attending each spring. Both kids were well enough to spend the day with Auntie L, which gave my husband and I the full day to ourselves. I became ill the day after. Again, a blessing that 'ralph and chuck' didn't ruin my day, either.

When God says 'in eveything give thanks', there really is always something for which to be thankful!

Now was there any other way to describe vomiting that I didn't use?

Awesome New Site

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Imagine That!

Okay, so I'm spending a little time reading online newpapers during my day. Every now and then a gem of a story pokes up. Read this, although the headline says it all.

Canadians are still following the socialist path, though. Just this year in Ontario we can now access early kindergarten - that's where you send your children to school all day at the age of 3. Sad.

Working with Discretion

Since Hoss is a breast feeder it makes things alot easier for travel. As long as he and I are together and we can find a place to sit, we're all set. This has been great for our camping trips, shopping trips and, of course, our trip to Niagara Falls. Even for everyday activities it has proven to be convenient for any schedule we may be trying to keep - including Sundays for church.

Hoss is still wanting to eat every 2-3 hours during the day, and I had started out trying to adjust the schedule if we had plans to leave the house. Just a little 'tweaking' of the timeline to be able to go out of the house and not need to feed him while we were out. This could cause quite a bit of frustration for him and myself - not to mention my husband who would be sitting outside waiting for us to finish nursing and come dashing to the car. I could not remember ever doing this with Duck, who was also breastfed. Finally I came to the conclusion that I had not done this with Duck because it was better to let her eat when she wanted and not interfere with that natural scheduling. So now, that is what Hoss and I do. We nurse everywhere.

Let's see...McDonald's, parking lots, beaches, campgrounds and church. The only place that has given me pause to reconsider this practice is church.

Now, I am very discreet. In the sanctuary of our church, there is a back corner fireplace with a love seat beside it. If Hoss needs to eat, we sit back there and no one needs to know it. It helps that our pastor preaches without his glasses and therefore can't see the front row of the congregation, never Hoss and I at the back! (There was that church we visited while camping where the pastor was caught a little off guard when looking at the back row and seeing me sitting alone with a poncho draped over myself and two little feet kicking out - quite the look crossed his face)

So what has given me reason to reconsider this whole set up? Hoss has yet to learn discretion in the process.

Hoss loves to nurse. Hoss loves to eat, period. His love of eating is easily understood by the yummy noises he makes (breathe, mmmmm, breathe, mmmmm, breathe, mmmmm, etc.) Several people in the back row of the congregation can be seen with their shoulders shaking as they laugh silently about the sounds emanating from the back corner.

All in all, everyone has been generous in seeing Hoss' habit as cute rather than annoying. A little blessing in belonging to a small church where everyone knows each other well enough to be open about such things.

Of course, how could anyone be annoyed at this:

Autumn Vacation

Our recent, generally annual trip to Niagara Falls was wonderful. Just like camping, we went on the trip with the understanding that if Hoss didn't manage well, we would head for home. Just like camping, Hoss enjoyed the trip as well as the rest of us. Travelling this far south in the fall means the flowers in Niagara are still blooming beautifully. This the town clock in Niagara on the Lake:Part of our tradition is to stop by a particular market that has jams, jellies, salsas, etc. made from their home grown produce. It is ridiculously exspensive, but they have free samples. We make our way around the store and try everything. Generally I buy some salt water taffy from them, but this year they decided not to make it! Very disappointing, but the samples were still good:For the first time, we visited Fort George on the Niagara River. The replication of the fort is pretty cool. The history behind the war of 1812 is all over Niagara, of course, but the fort (and the tour inside) makes it come alive to see how soldiers and their families lived during that time. The old guns and armoury is neat to see, too: You've heard the phrase, 'go soak your head' - seriously, at this point Duck and her dad were alone with the camera. I have no idea what they are doing:

For country bumpkins like us the hotel is just as much part of the vacation as visiting outside the city. Duck was quite the pool shark after a few games. We always pick a hotel with a good pool area and free breakfast - those are essentials:

Even though we have a video of Hoss in the pool for his first time, we don't have a picture. This however, is what he looks like after a day of heavy 'partying' with his big sister:

We are very thankful that God gave a baby that will travel with us to our usual haunts. How relaxed is that?

Summary of Summer

It has truly passed by in a flash! Here we are enjoying our usual vacation time in September/October and I don't remember much of summer - I guess that can be expected when it was spent in so many hospitals. So here is a quick picture summary of our activities of late:

First day of rice cerealA birthday party IN Algonquin Park. The family throwing the party works in the provincial park for the summer (dad is a bush pilot) and most of the festivities were held in the plane hanger - cool! The kids had face painting done.Hoss is known as of late as 'the pickle', so that strange thing on his forhead is...a pickle!Even after the party was over, we camped at the homestead of the host family for a couple of nights. Well...OK, we stayed in a trailer with full kitchen and indoor plumbing. Not really ruffin' it for first time camper Hoss.We took a semi-school trip to Sainte-Marie Among the Hurons, in Midland, Ontario. Long drive, but neat day. Here is my husband with a fox hat.Taking Hoss means having to find places to breastfeed. We're hiding in one of the display houses here - and take a few people by surprise when they realize what I'm doing!Here's the real camping trip. We spent three nights in a tent, but had good weather and a good portable heater!Don't let the smiles fool you...these two puberty queens can be really scary!

An autumn wedding. Two young people from our church who actually did it God's way! They met in the fall of 2009 and followed through on their convictions in courtship/purity. A real blessing to finally see it done right!Two beautiful children standing in the receiving line. OK, I'm biased.

And there you have it. Our summer in a nutshell. I have several other posts that are half written - sooner or later I'll finish them and get them out. Hope your summer and autumn has been a good to you, too!

The 'P' Word

Many years ago, when my husband and I were DINKS (double income, no kids) we did some unusual things. One particular event involved housing a raccoon in our home. My husband worked for a wildlife rehab and sanctuary at the time, and when they were overrun with raccoons at one point we decided to take one home and care for it. It was a baby raccoon, but she was very...um...rotund. She was given the name of Beatrice, because we thought she needed a moniker that provided some lady-like character to her. It would prove to be the only thing about her that was lady-like.

She was greedy, selfish, gluttonous and could be very nasty during her play. Oh, but she was adorable! The two dogs we had at the time did not agree with this assessment. My doberman/shepherd was a senior in age and did her best to simply ignore the intruder. This proved difficult when Beatrice would 'hunt' her in the living room. The raccoon would sneak up behind the dog, grab her backside and run away. The old dog would move to a new spot and sigh as she laid down again. This was before we owned a video camera otherwise we could have easily won the America's funniest video with this daily occurrence.

The other dog was only about 5 years old and did not have any patience for the wild rodent that had invaded her home. She was a black lab cross so these creatures were for hunting and killing as far as she was concerned. After some training, she came to realize that she was not allowed to harm this raccoon and it was a very confusing set up for her. So she came up with a solution. She moved into the closet. As soon as the racoon's cage door was opened, the Lab went to the bedroom and settled into the closet. A place of refuge and safety from the creature that she wanted to kill.

We often remember this situation when we talk about trying to avoid unpleasant things now. Laughing about how much better it would be if we could just move into the closet and ignore the unpleasantness, whatever it may be.

Well, the unpleasantness at the moment is the 'P' word. Our beautiful, almost 11 year old girl has been transformed by the 'P' word. Puberty. Lord help us!

All of a sudden there is drama everywhere. Anxiety is oozing out of her daily routine.

"What if I'm not really sorry for my sins?"; "How do I really know that God loves me?"; "How do I really know that I love Him or you?"; "Do you think boys notice me?"; "If I don't clean my room perfectly every time, is that disobedience?"

Every topic from God to boys to personal hygiene to daily chores is being questioned to death. If her father and I try to talk about anything in depth the tears start to fall. At one point, I sent her to her room for a full afternoon because I needed to breath for awhile.

I know, I know, this too shall pass. In the mean time pray for me! My patience is hanging on by a thread. My husband has moved into the closet.

A Decisive Man

As I mentioned in the previous posts about Hoss, he came home from hospital with a feeding tube in his nose(NG tube). I have hated that tube from the first week it was inserted. It was necessary in the beginning simply because Hoss did not have the 'natural' skill to suck, swallow, breath - in that order. For the first 2 1/2 weeks since he was born, Hoss received all his nutrition from an IV line. Once he started to wake up more, we needed to get his gastric system moving - so, tube in and he started taking 2ml of breast milk. Seriously, just 2ml (30ml = 1 ounce) to test out his digestion and elimination. It did increase quickly, and before too long he was receiving 80ml of breast milk through the tube every three hours.

Here is where the problem arose. The tube enters through Hoss' nose and goes down his esophagus and into his stomach. The tube is there constantly, so his stomach entry cannot close completely. This causes regurgitation and acid reflux. The tube can irritate the esophagus and cause increased mucous build up - this happens in the nose, too. Therefore, whether he took 2ml or 80ml of milk something always came back up. The smell of acid was prevalent in his burps and the coughing and sneezing could make him mad.

How is this tube a good thing?

Adding to the trouble with the presence of the tube, the hospital staff insisted on following a chart about the amount of intake rather than looking at Hoss as an individual. Remember, policy and procedure comes before common sense. Eventually, the hospital was increasing his intake to 115ml every four hours (I had to request that it be 4 hours apart vs. 3h) and immediately after the machine stopped pumping the milk into him, he would throw up at least 1/3 of it. The gurgle from his stomach was audible from a good distance and was quickly followed by a huge amount of spit up (change that, it wasn't a 'spit up' it was a throw up!)

All this I put up with in order to just get him home! I knew once I had him in my own house I could start adjusting his care to suit his needs. And that is exactly what I did. From the moment we walked in the door, Hoss' eating schedule was changed to every two hours at a total of 2 oz - I would work with him to take a whole ounce from a bottle and the remainder came through the tube. It was hard work and could be very frustrating. Really, a baby is supposed to know how to eat, right!?

The spit up still happened, but it was only small amounts - like any baby can have. However, Hoss was not progressing on the bottle very quickly. Part of his therapy was to encourage him to take a pacifier (to improve his suck), he did not like the 'doe-doe' as we call it. So the question remained, 'how are we ever going to get rid of the tube if Hoss won't take a bottle?'

I have found a few ladies on-line who had been through the experience. This brought mixed encouragement as some of their children have taken to the bottle after a few weeks of working on it, but some children are still on the tube after their 1st birthday! "Please God I don't want this tube here that long!"

One week to the day that we arrived home from hospital, Hoss was literally spitting out the nipple from his bottle each time it was offered to him. He was getting mad at me for sticking back in his mouth and I was getting frustrated with him for constantly turning his face into my chest.

Wait a minute...duh! Hoss was looking for the breast. So, I offered it to him half-heartily - not really expecting much. Then he nursed for 25 minutes in total. Go figure. All this time the experts were insisting the therapy with the bottle was the only way - and I was listening. Even an anti-socialist like me can get caught in the trap of ignorance. It took an infant to point it out to me!

From that point on, Hoss has chosen the breast over bottle. He is taking a doe-doe now, which is something I am most grateful for at 4 a.m. To top it all off, three days after he decided he would be a breast fed boy, he also pulled out the NG tube by himself. Which is good, because I might have received some prying questions from doctors if I had removed it. Did I mention how much I hated it?

Meet the tubeless wonder boy: First day at the beach!So there you have it...a little child shall lead them.

Though He Slay Me... (part 2)

I was so angry with God, but afraid to say it out loud. Is it okay to angry with God? Will He strike me down if I admit it to anyone? The bible tells me in several places to 'pour out my heart', but my heart didn't have anything nice to say to Him. Why is He putting my family through this trauma? Why is my newborn son's life hanging in the balance after waiting ten years for another child?

WHY?!

My son was born on June 13th and I was having this conversation with myself in my first full shower on June 15th in the parent's room at SickKids hospital in Toronto. The neonatologist had visited us this same evening to discuss the findings of his assessments and tests so far. The doctor's best guess was that our son had suffered a stroke during birth - because he was big and came fast. The only test remaining to complete was an MRI, which would be completed that night. We would have confirmation on a diagnosis within 24 hours, but we needed to be prepared for the possibility that our baby would not breath on his own, may never walk or come out of a constant seizure state.

How does a parent sleep after a conversation such as this? I can tell you, there is no sleeping.

We could visit our boy anytime we wanted, 24hours a day. He was on such heavy medications, including three seizure drugs, that he was unconscious. The many tubes and wires that were attached to him made it difficult to touch him and he was very swollen from many needle pricks and fluids he had received. All this, and the machine doing the breathing for him, he looked more like a robot than a baby.

The next 24hour wait is very much a blur in my mind. I know I ate, because my dad and his wife came and brought food to us. I know I walked around the hospital, because I remember feeling great resentment about how cheery they had made the environment (I wanted my surroundings to be just as black as I felt). I know my husband was at my side the entire time, because I remember holding his hand almost constantly. What I don't remember is talking, or thinking, or acknowledging anything. Both my husband and I were living in a fog.

For as much as we, as parents, were being drawn through the 'valley of death', our little Duck was having a hard time, too. In some ways it was harder for her because she was not at the hospital with us. She was seperated from her entire family and had little information other than her new baby brother was very sick. We were trying to protect her from the worst, but she is far more intelligent than we were giving her credit for being - she already had started praying for a miracle.

We finally reached the next evening and the neonatologist returned to our room, bringing the social worker and the duty nurse with him. This, to me, was a sign that he wanted extra support for the negative news he was about to deliver. He drew a picture of a brain to show us what had been discovered from the tests. Our son had suffered a brain bleed in the left ventricle of his brain. The blood that had collected in the ventricle had caused the seizures and some brain damage could be seen on the wall of the ventricle.

He raised his head to look at us and said, "this is far better news than a diagnosis of stroke".

What? This is good news?

The doctor continued to explain that the bleed had stopped on it's own and the blood would also reabsorb on it's own - our bodies are made to work that way. The damage was a small area on the wall of the ventricle that may affect our boy's right sided motor skills and his vision (they know this because the brain is mapped out very well). However, because he is just newborn, there may not be any noticeable affect. As he grows and learns to grab and walk and use his right side, he may simply adapt to any weaknesses and develop normally.

Yes...this was much better news than a stroke, which would have damaged a much larger portion of his brain. The doctor smiled at us and said, "I'm glad my initial assessment was wrong."

At this point, my nurse brain snapped back on - I started asking about care plans, future therapy, reductions in medications, etc. It didn't take me long to move past the dark world that I had been living in and move to a place of hope again.

It took a little longer to reconcile my feelings toward the Lord. The prayer of thanks was immediate, but I didn't have the answer to my 'why?' question. In the end, I have concluded that we are 'vessels of clay' and He will 'have mercy on whom He will have mercy.' I serve a soveriegn God and although I don't understand the purpose in this event, I simply accept that He had a purpose - and I may never know what it was.

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than you thoughts. Isaiah 55:8&9

To make the final part of the story short, our little man spent three weeks in SickKids before being transferred back to the first NICU where his seizures started. He stayed in that hospital for another two weeks and then CAME HOME! He came home with a feeding tube in place, but he was bright eyed and active. That activity has shown that his right arm and leg are strong and moving just as much as his left side!

I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. Psalm 139:14

I will expound on some of the details that I've skipped over here (including a commentary about why I still don't support socialized medicine). However, with a newborn boy keeping me busy at home - the posts may be slow in getting out.

Meet 'Hoss':

And the best babysitter I could ever have:

Though He Slay Me... (part one)

When expecting a child, most women daydream of the time they hold their new little one in their arms. To be able to gaze into your newborn's eyes, count ten fingers and ten toes. These anticipations are the thoughts that come at the end of a pregnancy - at least, that's where my thoughts were before June 13th of this year. My son was born that day. Just five days overdue.

I woke up at 1:30 a.m. in labour and woke the rest of my family by 2:30 a.m. to get ready to go to the hospital. After phoning the OB nurse at that same time, my water broke and we quickly headed out the door. Only a short labour period past and my son was born at 3:57 a.m. - that's only 2 1/2 hours from beginning to end. Some women with long labours may be impressed, even jealous at this expediency. Don't be, it was not a good thing.

Our handsome boy weighed in at 9lbs and 6 1/2 oz, 22 inches long. He was very bruised about his head because of the speed he came through the birth canal. Immediately, the medical staff noted that his blood sugar was too low and started the process to raise it. Their efforts did not improve the situation and within 5 hours of delivery we were transferred from our small town hospital to a more technologically advanced Neonatal Intensive Care Unit about an hour south of us. Little did we know the events that were to come.


Because my boy was in the care of a NICU with 24hour monitors and high ratio of staff to patient it was noted that he started to have seizures. In fact, the seizures became continuous to the point that he would stop breathing and require resuscitation. This is only day two of his life. Before this day was over, my son was intubated onto a full time respirator and we were being transferred to The Hospital for Sick Children in Toronto with no idea why the seizures were happening or if they could get them under control. More seriously, would our son ever breath on his own again. We had only held him for a short time after his birth and I had not been able to nurse him yet.

When we arrived at SickKids hospital, we were presented with the some of the initial test results and physical assessments. They did not know why the seizures were occurring. They did not know why this baby boy would not breath on his own. They only knew that we should be prepared for the possibility of having to say 'goodbye' to our boy after only saying 'hello' a few short hours before.

This isn't how it is supposed to happen. Not only did I start sending desperate cries to God, I had so many questions as to 'why' He would allow this to happen to my family. While I am questioning Him, I'm also trying to answer my 10 year old daughter's questions that are the same as mine. 'Why, Lord, why?' I didn't have an answer for her. All we could do was cry together as a family...and wait.

I was drawn to the book of Job - here was a man who had suffered much and maintained his faith:

What? shall we receive good at the hand of God, and shall we not receive evil? Job 2:10b

Though he slay me, yet will I trust him: Job 13:15

Obviously, I wanted a positive ending to our trauma. I did not want to share in Job's strengths by losing my child. I did not want to say goodbye.

(more to come as I am able to write it)

Making It Official

Let me start by saying 'thank you' to the lovely ladies who have emailed me to ask about my extended absence on the blog. I am fine, the baby is fine. The e-notes just brought forward the need to sign off the web world...albeit temporarily.

It isn't that I haven't had post ideas on my mind, in fact I have several notes jotted down. I just haven't got the energy to stay awake for my usual blogging time, which is after Duck and Dad are in bed. Somewhere between 10 p.m. and midnight I still enjoy visiting and reading other blogs, but pulling out the keyboard and concentrating on my spelling and grammar is just beyond my brain (baby brain!) at this point in my pregnancy.

So, I am signing off for a blogging sabbatical. At least for a few months until my life has returned to a normal energy level and some semblance of routine. If you want an announcement when the baby arrives, just email me and I will be sure to keep you in the loop.

You will see me around the web world visiting though - I need the encouragement that is always found at my favourite sites!

Family Friendly

These title words used to hold a lot of value when making decisions for a family. A family friendly restaurant or movie would generally get business from families looking for certain level of service or entertainment. Over the years this term has changed in meaning as the family has changed. If the family is made up of unmarried, teen aged parents with little to no visible self respect in the way they dress, behave or speak...what exactly does family friendly mean?

The 'golden arches' used to be considered a family friendly place to sit and eat with the kids. I don't see it this way as of late. The music being piped into the dining room can be anything from too loud to too crude - or both. There has been one occasion where I spoke directly to the manager to point out the crude lyrics of the song being played (I won't even repeat it here) and had the music turned off. Oddly enough, no one complained about the lack of music.

Another occasion at this same food place, I stood in line waiting for our order only to be confronted with one young female staff member bending over to reveal her pink thong and at least half of her backside! This time it was one of the managers!

The same lack of value can be placed on movies deemed to be family friendly. Several years ago we learned the hard way that a G movie does not mean it is appropriate for kids. The movie was about a spelling bee for public school kids (and was actually very entertaining) when out of no where someone decided to add profanity to the show. You could have knocked me over when it happened. Even christian movie reviewers seem to have lost the concept of 'acceptable' entertainment when they are recommending movies with comments like: "there are only a few incidents of sexual innuendo", "the message in the story outweighs the fact that profanity is used a couple of times". Yes, those are actual comments by christian movie reviewers.

We can never forget the wisdom that God lays out for us about allowing evil to become even a small part of our lives.

Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump? 1Cor. 5:6b

Simple, straightforward and plain as day for the christian to follow. It only takes a little bit of apathy toward sinful ways to give a good foothold for Satan to get into our lives - or the lives of our children. Don't be fooled...Satan wishes to sift us as wheat and will use any means to do it. It was Francis Schaeffer who said: "Show me what the world is saying today and I'll show you what the church will be saying in seven years." So true when we rely on the world to set a standard for our families.

Never be afraid to speak up about music invading your senses in public places - generally, the response is positive. Even if a request to silence the music is denied, it is an opportunity to teach our children about God's standards...and to find a new place to eat.

A Pep Talk

Over the last few months Duck has been attending singing lessons with a young SAHM who lives just a few blocks from us. We had known this young lady previously from the church circle in town - that was before she was married with kids. Being a homeschooling grad herself, and a SAHM, we were glad to give her some business when Duck expressed an interest in singing.

After a few singing sessions, this teacher started talking about homeschooling. I have heard the story before, "I wanted to homeschool my kids, but didn't think I could manage with two girls of school age and a baby boy, too." It's a widely held fallacy (or sometimes just an excuse) that public school is better for the older kids if mom has an infant to care for, as well. Her husband was not homeschooled, so when she had doubts about it, he encouraged public school.

Our short conversations about how we homeschool seemed to be polite exchange only - maybe a little curiosity, but not real interest in changing her situation. So, I answered her questions and expressed how much our family has benefited from homeschool. With no intention of changing to public school now that we have a baby on the way. She would smile and nod and the conversation ended. Very typical of conversations I have had in the past with curiosity seekers. Little did I know what God was doing.

Soon the conversations became more probing and she told me she had been speaking with other homeschooling parents from her church. Again, I am cautious about 'pushing' homeschool on anyone. Too many times I have seen people jump on the band wagon without really having a conviction from the Lord to train up their children in a homeschooling atmosphere - something that I see as crucial for success. So, I continued to talk positively to this young mom and I gave her Voddie Baucham's video 'Children of Caesar' with a preliminary warning that he is staunch in his homeschooling beliefs.

Well she watched the video - three times in two weeks. She watched it with friends, with her husband and with her parents. She told me about the behaviours she has seen in her public school daughters that disturb her and her husband - and they are only in grade 1 & 2. She wanted more information. I had to be careful not to spoil things for her and not to build her up for a fall either.

Homeschool is hard. Some days it is impossible! Anyone wanting to get into homeschool needs to know this and be prepared. I told her about my experience and how the responsibility falls on me for each day to happen with contentment even when things go awry. I talked about the benefits of my close relationship with Duck and how when things are tense/stressed at home, it is usually me that's responsible for letting it get that far. I told her I wouldn't change it for anything! That my husband and I are committed and convicted to the successful raising of a 'person' - not just emulating public school and creating another clone for society.

Then I held my tongue, 'you take it from here, Lord.'

She has continued to move toward bringing her kids home. I'm glad to see the slow steps she and her husband are taking, because it shows she is taking the whole process seriously. She has borrowed our old grade 1 & 2 school books to look through. She has ordered curriculum catalogues and visited other homeschooling families to see how the day goes. It also appears she will take some of my other advice and attend a homeschooling conference this spring.

It is exciting to see a young family taking the step to be full time parents. It also brings anxiety - 'have I given good counsel? do I pose a good role model? Am I presenting a balanced view of benefits and challenges that will come? have I given a good testimony for the life God has provided by following His will?'

Only God knows - I'm sure He will show me the answers to these questions in time. Until then...

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts: and be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you with meekness and fear:

1 Peter 3:15

Who Are You?

Something new has happened in our house. Actually, it's happening outside of the house twice a day. Duck has a job.

A few weeks back, we were receiving strange messages on our voicemail. We all just assumed that the voice of the senior lady was calling the wrong number and we would have to be home to catch the call to tell her. The messages were generally the same, "hi, it's Barb. I'll try to catch you later or you can reach me at home." We don't know a 'Barb' and certainly didn't know how to get her at home. Even after three messages, she never left her number.

Finally, my husband was home to receive the call from her. This time she asked for me by name - ? So, he took her message, complete with phone number, so that I could call her back. Turns out she and I have never met (I always enjoy proof that I'm not crazy), but she had been given my name as someone who may be able to walk her dog for her. We talked over the details and arranged to visit her the following day.

'Barb' is a senior living independently in condo with only her little dog as regular company. For those of you who have never dealt with seniors on a regular basis, this scenario means the dog is spoiled rotten!

Anyway, she needed someone to take the dog, Missy, out twice a day for short walks. With her condo only a five minute drive away, my husband and I decided Duck could take on this responsibility until the end of April (that is the estimated time of when I will not fit behind the steering wheel of the car). Barb and Missy were happy with our suggestion and the deal was done.

Now, just before lunch and again before supper, we drive over and take Missy out to accomplish her duties. Sounds pretty simple, right? Don't forget, this dog is spoiled. First, we have to put on her outdoor clothes. Then, the walk needs to be at least 20 minutes, generally in the direction that Missy wants to go. When we return, she must be towelled off thoroughly because the snow clumps in her fur. Finally, we enter the kitchen and brush her teeth - because the vet prescribed this treatment.

It is a great lesson as part of homeschool and we may continue for a couple of days per week after April. Just not the full 7 days per week, which is a real drain on our daily scheduling.

All in all, Duck is learning a great deal about fulfilling a job well and taking care of her money. Get this...it's ten dollars per day! That's $60 a week, because we volunteer our time on Sunday, and then she gets an extra $5 for teeth brushing. At this point, even though most of the paycheque is banked, Duck has more cash in her wallet than I do.

You Just Never Know

So much of this pregnancy has been the same as my first. I very rarely felt nauseous; I never throw up; and have similar cravings (tomatoes and pineapples - not together). So I have convinced myself that this was another girl. I know...not very scientific, but really, with only one pregnancy to go by it seems logical.

A little over a week ago, I had my first ultrasound. My friend, Lesley and Duck and I drove to the hospital with anticipation of seeing the baby for the first time. My husband and I had already chosen her name...Topanga Grace. The first name means 'unexpected' - get it? Unexpected grace! Which we thought was pretty cool. The ultrasound was just giving us confirmation to call her by name starting now.

Well, I was on that table for 45 minutes. The baby would not hold still for pictures (in fact, I have to go for a follow up u/s next week to try for better measurements). After about half way through, I had to ask to change position and the technician started talking about what she was seeing. At that point, I mentioned that we did want to confirm the gender if she could see that.

"Oh, I already know that.", she says with a grin.

"Can you tell me, or do I have to wait.", I ask as I bite my tongue to be patient with her.

"Sure, definitely a boy."

Uh-oh.

I was wrong. Something so rare I was speechless for a moment ;o)

So now the dilemma. We had no boy names prepared. Oh sure, we had tossed a few around in a casual manner early on...and there were some names we had considered in previous times. However, to officially be having a boy brings out the serious discussions! So here is a list of some of the top contenders. For the sake of being fair, I won't tell you which are mine, which are my husband's, or which are Duck's choices.

Comments and suggestions are encouraged!

Benjamin

Caleb

Isaiah

Jeremiah

Makobe (ma - KO - bee) - it means river, but mostly it is a combination of Mack and Jacob

Sullivan

We certainly talk about alot of others, but these are the ones that keep coming forward.

Still Cute After All These Years

Many years ago, probably when Duck was about 3 years old, she was famous for singing songs with her version of words. For instance, one that is always remembered fondly by my husband and I:

"it's amazing what praising can do...halla-lube-ya, halla-lube-ya!"

Now, at the great old age of 10, she is such a little lady. Well spoken, generally articulate and a good sense of humour. Also, still a real singer. The other day she was humming in the back seat of the car as we were headed for home:

"in the meadow we can build a snowman, and pretend that he is possum Brown..."

I guess she's unfamiliar with the word parson. Just a reminder that she is still a kid, and just as cute as when she was three.

Growing Apart

It happens in every marriage, I can't admit to being really surprised it is happening to mine. Some might think I should be more saddened by my husband and I growing apart, except I'm not talking about an emotional situation.

No. This is a physical thing that we have both noticed in the last couple of weeks. You see, I am taller than my husband by a small amount, but we have always managed to compromise about the position of the driver's seat in the car. Not anymore.

Either he is getting shorter or...OK, it's me. I'm the problem. At 20 weeks pregnant, I no longer can fit behind the wheel of the car without adjusting the seat. Everytime my husband gets into the driver's seat after I have been using the car, he can't reach to push in the clutch.

Actually, my repositioning of the seat is a bench mark for when I won't be able to work anymore. When I was pregnant with Duck all those years ago, I remember the day there was no posibility of driving anymore. That point is still awhile away - but that is when I need help to grocery shop, visit friends and go to work.

Never mind tying my own shoes, Duck is here for that when I need her, but soliciting for chauffeurs is another case altogether! I'll let you know when I get there!

A Vacation in Pictures

Obviously, after so many celebrations and a vacation away there are well over a hundred pictures of the events. I had a hard time choosing which ones to share here, but have a look anyway - our first part of Christmas came when we visited my dad...One of the favourite activities at Grampa and Gramma's house is using the burn barrel!Christmas morning and the Duck just opened her first 'real' camera. A real hit for a present...and the reason we will have more pictures like this:And this...We joined our friends for a Christmas dinner and ate far too much - of course.These are the leftovers (and the mess!)Every year we put together a gift basket for the whole family - trying to get something for everyone. What would a gift basket be without some crazy string?The crazy string was everywhere and stuck on everyone. My husband and I were innocent bystanders!The end of the evening was saved for games. We played Settlers of Catan and the men enjoyed Extreme Jenga.

Then, on the 27th, we all headed for Niagara Falls. The whole vacation was relaxing and fun! For the kids it's all about the pool:There was a sun room in the hotel that we used as a personal buffet room for our group. Bringing the groceries cuts down on the expenses.Christmas in Niagara Falls means the Festival of Lights. There were hundreds of displays like the one below. It was cold for walking, but we bared it for one night to see the many displays. There was a blessing in the mix, too. The pool at the hotel was closed down for maintenance one day, so the manager offered us an extra night FREE! The kids were thrilled - OK, so were the adults.

Now, we are home and happy to be in our own beds. The dogs missed us. It is hard to imagine getting back into the routine of school tomorrow, but all vacations must come to an end. (Sigh)

Happy New Year!

Upside Down Turtle

My computer is also my television. It is, obviously, in the living room of my home, and we have a bean bag chair that we place in front of the computer/TV stand when keyboarding. Neither my husband or I are technologically advanced enough to set the system up so that we can sit on the couch or lazyboy while 'computing'. I imagine the cost of the extra wiring is more than I am willing to pay, too.

So, I am having a hard time blogging lately. Not because there aren't events happening that I would like to share. No, I have several posts in my mind, actually. The problem is getting up from the computer when I'm done. Getting into the bean bag chair isn't difficult. Just plop down. However, when I am ready to get up, my increasing baby belly adds a new dimension to awkward.

Picture this: I have to roll to one side of the bean bag chair to get on all fours. Depending on which direction I roll, the coffee table or the fireplace provides support as I lift myself to a standing position. The dog thinks I'm playing a game with him.

Generally, it is more worth the effort when I can sit and write several posts all at once. Now that you know, be patient with me and my irregular posting. Of course, each time you do visit and read a new post, picture me rolling back to a standing position - it's okay to laugh, I do.